The Wiccan Rede

Bide the Wiccan Laws we must In Perfect Love and Perfect Trust. Live and let live. Fairly take and fairly give. Cast the Circle thrice about To keep the evil spirits out. To bind the spell every time Let the spell be spake in rhyme. Soft of eye and light of touch, Speak little, listen much. Deosil go by the waxing moon, Chanting out the Witches' Rune. Widdershins go by the waning moon, Chanting out the baneful rune. When the Lady's moon is new, Kiss the hand to her, times two. When the moon rides at her peak, Then your heart's desire seek, Heed the North wind's mighty gale, Lock the door and drop the sail. When the wind comes from the South, Love will kiss thee on the mouth. When the wind blows from the West, Departed souls will have no rest. When the wind blows from the East, Expect the new and set the feast. Nine woods in the cauldron go, Burn them fast and burn them slow. Elder be the Lady's tree, Burn it not or cursed you'll be. When the Wheel begins to turn, Let the Beltane fires burn. When the Wheel has turned to Yule, Light the log and the Horned One rules. Heed ye Flower, Bush and Tree, By the Lady, blessed be. Where the rippling waters go, Cast a stone and truth you'll know. When ye have a true need, Hearken not to others' greed. With a fool no season spend, Lest ye be counted as his friend. Merry meet and merry part, Bright the cheeks and warm the heart. Mind the Threefold Law you should, Three times bad and three times good. When misfortune is enow, Wear the blue star on thy brow. True in Love ever be, Lest thy lover's false to thee. Eight words the Wiccan Rede fulfill: An ye harm none, do what ye will.
- Blessed Be -
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Legal Stuff

Legal Statement: My selection of, and comments on, products in my Blogs are neither an endorsement, nor a disapproval of a particular product or products. It is just my choice and my opinion on products I selected of many products available. I have no association with any company mentioned. I provide links to various companies so that you may easily obtain information, if desired, about products or references. Just a side note I can view You Tube videos faster and better if I link to them outside of You Tube. The connection, video and audio do not lag any when I view them this way. In doing so I no way claim any part of the videos, just the pure enjoyment of sharing them through my blog. A note about Comments: To date I have deleted or removed over 70 comments that were posted on my blog. If you can read my blog then you understand "English", I Speak, Read, and Write in English only. So if you have comments you wish to share with me about my blogs please be sure they are in "English". Of those 70 some comments that I translated in the past - they were not suitable for most people or for children to read. If you can not leave me a comment in English I will have to delete it - assuming that it is something you really do not want me to see since it is not in English. As much as I desire comments they must be in English, Thank you. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License. PRIVACY NOTICE: Warning - any person and/or institution and/or Agent and/or Agency of any governmental structure including but not limited to the United States Federal Government also using or monitoring/using this website or any of its associated websites, you do NOT have my permission to utilize any of my profile information nor any of the content contained herein including, but not limited to my photos, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other "picture" art posted on my profile. You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating, or taking any other action against me with regard to this profile and the contents herein. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee , agent , student or any personnel under your direction or control. The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, and the violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law. UCC 1-103 1-308 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED WITHOUT PREJUDICE

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Eye balling the Benjamin Marauder.

I have created a wish list at the site.  Below I show off a few photos.

 Marauder-magazine-10-shot  Benjy_Pump_2222_zm-1  Benjy_Pump_2222_zm-2 laserboreDiscoveryTin_586sm LERG18D-30H

The scope below is a Hawke Sport Optics Eclipse 6-24x50AO Rifle Scope, Illuminated Mil-Dot Reticle, 1/4 MOA, 30mm Tube is a nice one it may be this one or the second below.


This is the HAWKE SideWinder 30 8-32x56 Riflescope, Matte  Black with Illuminated  Mil Dot Reticle (HK4014) Review it here. It is not uncommon to spend as much on the scope as you do with the rifle.

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BlackHawk Long Gun Pack Mat  above is a nice drag bag for the Marauder.

A true professional deserves BlackHawk's Long Gun Pack Mat w/ Hawktex to fully round out his abilities. This unique piece of gear is made with 1000 denier Nytaneon® and can change missions along with the operator.

It is used as a rifle carrying case, a backpack, a jungle drag bag and as a shooting mat complete with removable notebook pouch, bullet pouch,weapons cleaning kit pouch and bolt pouch. HawkTex® on the mat prevents slipping whether it is hot or cold, wet or dry. This is an outstanding piece of gear and every rifleman must have one!

• HawkTex® Elbow lock-in systems
• Full wrap around carry handles
• All compartments closed by #9 YKK zippers
• Hard plastic crown protective cover lined with closed cell foam
• Concealable fully-padded backpack harness straps & belt
• Sternum strap elasticized for comfortable fit
• Closed cell foam insulation and padding
• Fits most rifles up to 50" in length
• Freefall and static line jumpable
• HYDRASTORM® Compatible
• Dimensions: 50 x 14 x 4
• Available in Black, Desert Tan & OD Green

Our Price $227.69 (Retail Price $252.99)
No. 26-2230 to 26-2232

Extramarital Affairs

Extramarital Affairs by Relationship Gold

Extramarital Affairs: What Everyone Needs to Know... and what you can do to help by Dr. Robert Huizenga LMFT, CSW, The Infidelity Coach

Recent statistics suggest that 40% of women (and that number is increasing) and 60% of men at one point indulge in extramarital affairs. Put those numbers together and it is estimated that 80% of the marriages will have one spouse at one point or another involved in marital infidelity.

That may seem like a very steep number. However after two decades plus of full time work as a marriage and family therapist, I don't believe that number is off the charts. I worked with a great number of people involved in infidelity who were never discovered.
The possibility that someone close to you is or soon will be involved in an extramarital affair (any of the three parties) is extremely high.

Maybe you will know. You will see telltale signs. You will notice changes in the person's habits and behavioral patterns as well as a detachment, lack of focus and reduced productivity. Maybe you will sense something "out of character" but be unable to pinpoint what it is.

It is not a given that he/she will tell you. Those hiding the affair will continue to hide. The "victim" of the extramarital affair often, at least initially, is racked with anger, hurt, embarrassment and thoughts of failing that preclude divulging the crisis.

It might be important to confront the person with your observations, depending on the status of your relationship with the person.

It is important to understand that extramarital affairs are different and serve different purposes.

Out of my study and experience with hundreds of couples I've identified 7 different kinds of infidelity.

Briefly, some extramarital affairs are reactivity to a perceived lack of intimacy in the marriage. Others arise out of addictive tendencies or a history of sexual confusion or trauma.

Some in our culture play out issues of entitlement and power by becoming "trophy chasers." This "boys will be boys" mentality is subtly encouraged in some contexts. Some become involved in marital infidelity because of a high need for drama and excitement and are enthralled with the idea of "being in love" and having that "loving feeling."

An extramarital affair might be for revenge either because the spouse did or did not do something. Or the revenge may stem from rage. Although revenge is the motive for both, they look and feel very different.

Another form of infidelity serves the purpose of affirming personal desirability. A nagging question of being "OK" may lead to usually a short-term and one-person affair. And finally, some affairs are a dance that attempts to balance needs for distance and intimacy in the marriage, often with collusion from the spouse.

The prognosis for survivability of the marriage is different for each. Some affairs are the best thing that happens to a marriage. Others serve a death knell. As well, different extramarital affairs demand different strategies on the part of the spouse or others. Some demand toughness and movement. Others demand patience and understanding.

The emotional impact of the discovery of infidelity is usually profound. Days and weeks of sleeplessness, rumination, fantasies (many sexual) and unproductivity follow. It typically takes 2 – 4 years to "work through" the implications. A good coach or therapist can accelerate and mollify the process. I don't recommend "marriage" counseling, at least initially.

The devastating emotional impact results from a couple powerful dynamics. Trust is shattered – of one's ability to discern the truth. The most important step is NOT to learn to trust the other person, but to learn to trust one's self. Another is the power that a secret plays in relationships. THE secret exacts an emotional and sometimes physical toll that needs to be acknowledged and dealt with.

How can you help?

Those in the midst of their affair crisis told me they need this from you:

1. Sometimes I want to vent, get it out without censor. I know sometimes I will say what I shouldn't be saying. It may not be nice, pretty or mild. Please know that I know better, but I need to get it off my chest.

2. Every so often I want to hear something like, "This too shall pass." Remind me that this is not forever.

3. I want to be validated. I want to know that I am OK. You can best do that by nodding acceptance when I talk about the pain or confusion.

4. I want to hear sometimes, "What are you learning? What are you doing to take care of yourself?" I may need that little jolt that moves me beyond my pain to see the larger picture.

5. I may want space. I may want you to be quiet and patient as I attempt to sort through and express my thoughts and feelings. Give me some time to stammer, stutter and stumble my way through this.

6. I want someone to point out some new options or different roads that I might take. But before you do this, make sure I am first heard and validated.

7. When they pop into your mind, recommend books or other resources that you think I might find helpful.

8. I want to hear every so often, "How's it going?" And, I may want this to be more than an informal greeting. Give me time and space to let you know exactly how it IS going.

9. I want you to understand and welcome the ambivalent feelings and desires. I would like you to be fairly comfortable with the gray areas and the contradictions about how I feel and what I may want.

10. I want you to be predictable. I want to be able to count on you to be there, listen and speak consistently or let me know when you are unable to do that. I will honor that.

Extramarital affairs are powerful. Affairs are costly. They affect family, friends, colleagues and employers. Infidelity is also an opportunity – to redesign one's life and love relationships in ways that create honor, joy and true intimacy.

Other Forms of Dementia

Alzheimer's Disease: Other Forms of Dementia

Dementia is the loss of mental functions -- such as thinking, memory, and reasoning -- that is severe enough to interfere with a person's daily functioning. Dementia is not a disease itself, but rather a group of symptoms that are caused by various diseases or conditions. Symptoms can also include changes in personality, mood, and behavior. In some cases, the dementia can be treated and cured because the cause is treatable. Examples of this include dementia caused by substance abuse (illicit drugs and alcohol), combinations of prescription medications, and hormone or vitamin imbalances. In some cases, although the person may appear to have dementia, a severe depression can be causing the symptoms. This is known as pseudo-dementia (false dementia) and is highly treatable. In most cases, however, a true dementia cannot be cured.

Dementia develops when the parts of the brain that are involved with learning, memory, decision-making, and language are affected by one or more of a variety of infections or diseases. The most common cause of dementia is Alzheimer's disease, but there are as many as 50 other known causes. Most of these causes are very rare.

Because some causes of dementia can be cured or partially treated, it is very important that your doctor is thorough when making the diagnosis, so as not to miss potentially treatable conditions. The frequency of "treatable" causes of dementia is believed to be about 10%.

What Causes Dementia?

There are several things which could cause dementia:

  • Diseases that cause degeneration or loss of nerve cells in the brain such as Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and Huntington's.
  • Diseases that affect blood vessels, such as stroke, which can cause a disorder known as multi-infarct dementia.
  • Toxic reactions, like excessive alcohol or drug use.
  • Nutritional deficiencies, like vitamin B12 and folate deficiency.
  • Infections that affect the brain and spinal cord, such as AIDS dementia complex and Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease.
  • Certain types of hydrocephalus, an accumulation of fluid in the brain that can result from developmental abnormalities, infections, injury, or brain tumors.
  • Head injury -- either a single severe head injury or longer term smaller injuries, like in boxers.
  • Illness other than in the brain -- kidney, liver, and lung diseases can all lead to dementia.

Alzheimer's disease causes 50-60% of all dementias. But researchers have found that two nervous diseases, which were originally incorrectly diagnosed as Alzheimer's, are emerging as major causes of dementia: Lewy body disease and Pick's disease.

How Common Is Dementia?

Diseases that affect blood vessels, such as stroke, which can cause a disorder known as multi-infarct dementia.

Dementia caused by nervous system disease, especially Alzheimer's disease, is increasing in frequency more than most other types of dementia. Some researchers suspect that as many as half of all people over 80 years old develop Alzheimer's disease. Also, the increased incidence of AIDS dementia complex, which results from HIV infection, helps account for the increased dementia in recent history, although with the invention of newer and better drugs to treat HIV, the occurrence of AIDS-associated dementia is declining.

Who Gets Dementia?

Dementia is considered a late-life disease because it tends to develop mostly in elderly people. About 5-8% of all people over the age of 65 have some form of dementia, and this number doubles every five years above that age. It is estimated that as many as half of people in their 80s suffer from dementia.

Which Dementias Are Treatable?
  • Dementia due to long-term substance abuse.
  • Tumors that can be removed.
  • Subdural hematoma, accumulation of blood beneath the outer covering of the brain that result from a broken blood vessel, usually as a result of a head injury.
  • Normal-pressure hydrocephalus.
  • Metabolic disorders, such as a vitamin B12 deficiency.
  • Hypothyroidism, a condition that results from an under-active thyroid.
  • Hypoglycemia, a condition that results from low blood sugar.
What Are Some of the Non-treatable Causes of Dementia?
  • Alzheimer's disease.
  • Multi-infarct dementia (Dementia due to multiple small strokes).
  • Dementias associated with Parkinson's disease and similar disorders.
  • AIDS dementia complex.
  • Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (CJD), a quickly progressing and fatal disease that consists of dementia and muscle twitching and spasm.

Reviewed by the doctors at The Cleveland Clinic Neuroscience Center.

Help for Depression

Taken from : Help for Depression

Helping Yourself

Depressive disorders make you feel exhausted, worthless, helpless, and hopeless. Such negative thoughts and feelings make some people feel like giving up. You should realize that these negative views are part of depression, and typically do not accurately reflect your life situation. Negative thinking fades as treatment begins to take effect. Psychotherapy, especially cognitive psychotherapy, is specifically designed to change the negative thinking associated with depression.

In the meantime:

  • Do not set difficult goals for yourself, or take on additional responsibility.
  • Break large tasks into small ones, set some priorities, and do what you can as you can.
  • Do not expect too much from yourself too soon, as this will only increase your feelings of failure.
  • Try to be with other people; it is usually better than being alone.
  • Force yourself to participate in activities that may make you feel better.
  • Try engaging in mild exercise, going to a movie, a ball-game, or participating in religious or social activities.
  • Don't overdo it or get upset if your mood is not greatly improved right away. Feeling better takes time.
  • Do not make major life decisions, such as changing jobs, getting married or divorced, without consulting others who know you well and who have a more objective view of your situation. In any case, it is advisable to postpone important decisions until your depression has lifted.
  • Do not expect to snap out of your depression. People rarely do. Help yourself as much as you can, and do not blame yourself for not being up to par.
  • Remember, do not accept your negative thinking. It is part of the depression and will disappear as your depression responds to treatment.
  • Get help from a professional.  No matter how much you want to beat it yourself, a psychologist can help you recover faster.

Helping the Depressed Person

The most productive way to assist a depressed person, is to help him or her get appropriate treatment. This may involve encouraging the individual to stay with treatment until the symptoms begin to abate (several weeks), or to seek different treatment if no improvement occurs. On occasion, it may require making an appointment and accompanying the depressed person to appointments with the psychologist. It may also mean monitoring whether the depressed person is taking medication, if prescribed.

The second most important way to help is to offer emotional support. This involves understanding, patience, affection, and encouragement. Engage the depressed person in conversation and listen carefully. Do not disparage feelings expressed, but point out realities and offer hope. Do not ignore remarks about suicide. Always report them to the depressed person's psychologist.

Invite the depressed person for walks, outings, to the movies, and other activities. Be gently insistent if your invitation is refused. Encourage participation in some activities that once gave pleasure, such as hobbies, sports, religious or cultural activities, but do not push the depressed person to undertake too much too soon. The depressed person needs diversion and company, but too many demands can increase feelings of failure.

Do not accuse the depressed person of faking illness or of laziness, or expect him or her "to snap out of it." Eventually, with treatment, most depressed people do get better. Keep that in mind, and keep reassuring the depressed person that, with time and help, he or she will feel better.

Depressed People May Need Help to get Help

The very nature of depression can interfere with a person's ability to get help. Depression saps energy and self-esteem and makes a person feel tired, worthless, helpless, and hopeless. Therefore,

  • Seriously depressed people need encouragement from family and friends to seek treatment to ease their pain.
  • Some people need even more help, becoming so depressed, they must be taken for treatment.
  • Don't ignore suicidal thoughts, words or acts. Seek professional help immediately.

Where to Get Help

A complete psychological diagnostic evaluation will help you decide the type of treatment that might be best for you. You can consult the National Directory of Psychologists on this website to locate a psychologist near your home, or contact the Psychological Association in your state to receive a referral. Contact information for all State Psychological Associations can also be found in the National Directory of Psychologists.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Suicide? Coping with Pain!

If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.

I don’t know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, you’re reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.

I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I won’t argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.

Well, you’re still reading, and that’s very good. I’d like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you’re at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So let’s hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.

Start by considering this statement: “Suicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.”

That’s all it’s about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn’t even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.

Don’t accept it if someone tells you, “that’s not enough to be suicidal about.” There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.

When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.

You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.

Now I want to tell you five things to think about.

1 You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.

2 Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, “I will wait 24 hours before I do anything.” Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn’t mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it’s just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.

3 People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.

4 Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.

But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what’s going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:

  • Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
  • Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
  • Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
  • Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
  • Call a psychotherapist
  • Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen

But don’t give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.

5 Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.

Well, it’s been a few minutes and you’re still with me. I’m really glad.

Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So let’s give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.

Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose won’t be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. It’s time to start looking around for one of them.

Now: I’d like you to call someone.

And while you’re at it, you can still stay with me for a bit. Check out these sources of online help.

Additional things to read at this site:

  • How serious is our condition? ...“he only took 15 pills, he wasn’t really serious...” if others are making you feel like you’re just trying to get attention... read this.

  • Why is it so hard for us to recover from being suicidal? ...while most suicidal people recover and go on, others struggle with suicidal thoughts and feelings for months or even years. Suicide and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

  • Recovery from grief and loss ...has anyone significant in your life recently died? You would be in good company... many suicidal people have recently suffered a loss.

  • The stigma of suicide that prevents suicidal people from recovering: we are not only fighting our own pain, but the pain that others inflict on us... and that we ourselves add to. Stigma is a huge complicating factor in suicidal feelings.

  • Resources about depression ...if you are suicidal, you are most likely experiencing some form of depression. This is good news, because depression can be treated, helping you feel better.

Do you know someone who is suicidal... or would you like to be able to help, if the situation arises? Learn what to do, so that you can make the situation better, not worse.

Other online sources of help:
  • The Samaritans - trained volunteers are available 24 hours a day to listen and provide emotional support. You can call a volunteer on the phone, or e-mail them. Confidential and non-judgmental. Short of writing to a psychotherapist, the best source of online help.

  • Talk to a therapist online - Read this page to find out how.

  • Depression support group online: Walkers in Darkness - Please note: this is a very big group, but amidst all the chatter (and occasional bickering), it ispossible to find someone who will hear you and offer support.

  • Psych Central has a good listing of online resources for suicide and other mental health needs.

  • Still feel bad? These jokes might relieve the pressure for a minute or two.

  • If you want help finding a human being to talk with in person, who can help you live through this, try reading this article about how to Choose a Competent Counselor.

Sometimes people need additional private help before they are ready to talk with someone in person. Here are three books you could read on your own in private. I know from personal experience that each one has helped someone like you.

  • Suicide: The Forever Decision by Paul G. Quinnett, PhD (Continuum, 1989, $8.95, ISBN 0-8264-0391-3). Frank and helpful conversation with a therapist who cares. Order the book

  • Choosing to Live: how to defeat suicide through cognitive therapy by Thomas E. Ellis PsyD and Cory F. Newman PhD (New Harbinger Publications, 1996, $12.95, ISBN 1-57224-056-3). Another conversational book with practical help for suicidal persons. Order the book

  • How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me: One Person's Guide to Suicide Prevention by Susan Rose Blauner (William Morrow, 2002, $17.47, ISBN 0066211212). A very practical survival guide by an actual survivor. Order the book

I make no profit whatever on the books. Every penny received is given to The Samaritans to support their lifesaving work. The volunteers give generously of themselves, but it costs them money to continue operating and saving lives - money for facilities, phones and computers. Money is a reality. They need it; we give it. Sending them this small donation is our way of thanking them and helping them continue to help others. If you would like to know where the money goes, visit the Samaritans website. If you prefer not to make a donation to the Samaritans, take the book information above to your local bookstore and order the books there instead. If you would like to make a donation directly to the Samaritans, click here.

  • Out of the Nightmare: Recovery From Depression And Suicidal Pain, by David L. Conroy, PhD (Authors Choice Press, 2006, ISBN 0595414974). As if suicidal persons weren't feeling bad enough already, our thoughtless attitudes can cause them to feel guilt and shame, and keep them from getting help in time. Dr. Conroy blasts apart the myths of suicide, and looks at suicidal feelings from the inside, in a down to earth, non-judgmental way. This is a book that will save lives by washing away the stigma of suicide and opening the door to a real way out of the nightmare. More info and reviews

Would you like to print out this page? Here is a plain black-on-white version that should print more easily.

Want to share your suicide story?
Please visit the Suicide Project and leave your story

Have feedback? Please write us  This page is provided as a public service by Metanoia, and is dedicated with gratitude to David Conroy, Ph.D. whose work inspired it. Metanoia cannot provide counseling to suicidal persons. If you need help please use the resources outlined above.

© Copyright 1995-2006 Martha Ainsworth. All rights reserved. Reprints: Please feel free to link to this page. Please do not reproduce this page on the Internet; you may link to it instead. You may reproduce this page in print media for non-commercial, non-profit use only, if you meet the following three conditions: (1) you must use the full text without alteration up to and including the words "Now: I’d like you to call someone."; (2) please consider making a donation to The Samaritans (see above); and (3) you must print the following notice verbatim: "Reprinted with permission. Suicide: Read This First ( was written by Martha Ainsworth based on work by David Conroy, Ph.D. To talk with a caring listener about your suicidal feelings, in the U.S. call 1-800-SUICIDE any time, day or night. Online, send an anonymous e-mail to for confidential and non-judgmental help, or visit"

Sometimes I feel like…

Poll results.

In my recent poll, the Benjamin Marauder beat the RWS 850 3 to 1.  The RWS 850 has been around  for a while. This certainly tells you the Crosman is on the right track.  Thanks you for taking part in my pole.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Always and Forever

Just a special Message to Sharon, I express my Love. I will always Love you no matter what may be. "The path we follow is not mapped out for us but is drawn as we journey along the path."

Let be known to all the world, and GOD above, that

Andrew James Elliott Jr.

Has re-entered into a solemn commitment and vow to

Sharon Annette Swann-Elliott.

We have already been through a lot together, and I believe that God has been preparing us for this moment and for our future together. I promise to keep the good memories alive, and to let the bad ones die. I vow not to let the sun go down on our anger, and to treat each morning as a new day to love you, the gift I have been given. I will not forsake you or these vows that I have made, but rather strive to show you my love for the rest of our lives. This is my promise to you.

Though life may not always be as perfect as it is at this moment, I vow to always keep my love as pure as it is today. I promise to be there for you in your laughter and your tears, in your sickness and your health, in your comfort and your fears, in your poverty and your wealth. I know that our love is heaven sent, and I promise to be there for you for all your life, come what may.

I will you love, respect and honor you throughout our years together. I Promise to love and cherish you, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep myself only unto you, for so long as you both shall live.

I pledge to give to you the same happiness that you give to me, to react to you as only I can, and to respect you for you are the one whom I want to be with. With all my heart, body, and soul, I take you to be my Wife and Partner.

I will love you through the good and the bad, through the joy and the sorrow. I will try to understand, and to trust in you completely. I will make you a part of me and in turn, become a part of you. Together we will face all of life's experiences and share one each others dreams and goals. We will be equal partners in an open, honest relationship throughout the years.

It is my intention to be your best friend, to respect and support you, to be patient with you, to work together with you to achieve those things that are important to us, to accept you unconditionally, and to share life with you throughout the years.

When you need someone to encourage you, I want it to be me. When you need a helping hand, I want it to be mine.

When you long for someone to smile at, turn to me. When you have something to share, share it with me.

I pledge to you with all my heart and being to love and support you in all ways, to my utmost capabilities, for the rest of our lives.

Sworn to you on this date _AUG 24th every Year_, signed and notarized.

Andrew James Elliott Jr.

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